


Someday

by litspinels



Category: Psycho-Pass
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-25
Updated: 2016-02-25
Packaged: 2019-10-22 08:59:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17659757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/litspinels/pseuds/litspinels





	Someday

It could hardly pass for a functioning school; old building, cracked paint on walls and dusty windows, empty hallways with no sign of activity save for the rustling of dried leaves on the deserted courtyard—not a single soul in sight. The sign was almost unnoticeable, rusted metal beneath an overgrown bush, like those places in old, scary movies where you did not want to set foot in. Hard to believe, even, that a place like this existed South of the country, considering most of the surrounding provinces had been redeveloped with unmanned power plants required to light up downtown Tokyo. If the city were any indication of the population decline, surely this place warranted to strengthen that claim. Still, arriving at her destination sparked life in her tired bones, and for someone who had been walking for a good while it was only now that she had begun to feel the gravel on the soles of her feet.

Beyond the empty tennis court was a wide, wooden classroom—a sole structure in that dismal place that held life and joy around it. She could hear voices of children’s laughter fill the air as she drew near, her gaze taking in the hand-made lanterns that hung outside the porch, swaying with the wind in their different colors, and the small shoes that were lined up by the open door. The students would heed a call of silence, from a voice she would recognize anywhere, and all that was left between her and the door was five steps and the sound of her heartbeat.

He looked as if they had just parted yesterday.

His voice held a particular cheer, an unspoken sense of joy with what he was doing. In his hand was a book, while his other hand with fingers dusty with chalk—a tool she could hardly believe still existed—glided easily on the board while he read out loud. He wore black pants and a white shirt tucked in leaving two buttons undone, sleeves rolled up to his forearms and his hair cut short; very different from the rugged, unkempt look in which she had saw him last.

“There’s a lady by the door, Kogami-sensei!”

She was not aware of how long she stood there; only vividly aware of his eyes resting on hers and looking at her—for the briefest of seconds—like someone he had never met before. He invites her for a seat and she obliges, bowing to the class and she takes the one at the back, smiling at the small faces that looked up at her in curiosity. The discussion continued as it had before she interrupted it, and Akane Tsunemori looks on with piqued interest at the man she thought she knew.

***

The class ended just a few minutes later, much to Akane’s surprise. It had not occurred to her how late it must have been. She figured her exhaustion had kept her rooted to the chair much smaller than her size, after having walked a distance that she couldn’t measure. Little by little the children filed out of the room, shyly glancing at her before they said goodbye to their teacher and chased each other out the courtyard. A girl in the front row, who had been looking back curiously while the class went on, approached her while Kogami was busy clearing the blackboard.

“Hello,” Akane spoke, smiling at the young girl.

“Are you our teacher’s wife?”

Though taken aback, she could peer through the top of the young girl’s head the still of Kogami’s arm for a fraction of a second before, as if he too was interested in what she had to say, but like her, his composure returned a moment later and continued what he was doing. Akane answered with a shake of her head, watching the girl’s enthusiasm change into a disappointed frown, eyebrows raised in dissatisfaction.

“I thought you were!” she continued, stepping closer and reaching out to touch her face. Akane could not resist the small chuckle escaping her lips, nor the slight embarrassment that she had felt. The young girl’s hand stroked her cheek, eyes filled with fascination. “You look like Kogami-sensei’s wife.”

“I’m not married—“she heard him say, without turning around, dusting the chalk off the palm of his hands. Undeterred, the young girl planted a kiss on Akane’s cheek before running towards the back door, poking her tongue out at her teacher just before he turned around. There was an arrested moment when she could not bring it to herself to face him, her body instinctively following the young girl. She could hear the sound of his footsteps on the floor, silently wishing he would pretend the last few minutes just didn’t happen.

“They…”

He met her gaze with a smile, though he had been unable to continue his sentence for a moment. It had been a good while; in fact it had been two years since he saw her last. Either there was a pattern of their meeting in multiples of two, or somehow, subconsciously, they had both been working towards making it so. Through the years he had learned to differentiate the Akane he meets; from the young, inexperienced Inspector of twenty, she had grown tough in a matter of months—a fire in her eyes worth a thousand suns burning of conviction and ideals, the kind he had not the strength to uphold; to the woman of twenty-four who had thrown punches as compelling as her words, a transformation from intelligent to wise.

This Akane was exhausted, physically, but stronger, much like he had always known.

“They don’t often see women of your age around here,” he reached for her bag and swung it over his shoulder. Tilting his head slightly as an invitation, her eyes fell to the floor, watching the dust on her shoes that had made a trail from the front door. He followed her gaze and held out his hand as she rose from the chair, his grip strong, almost aware of the boost she needed to even stand. Their hands part when the touch had served its purpose, and he turned around to lead the way as if it didn’t mean anything to him to be holding her in the simplest of ways and in a time necessary. Just like the before, he had helped her up, though the desire to keep holding her remained.

“You could say they got a bit excited at the prospect. And I can’t say I’m offended—they seem to think we’re the same age.”

Akane let out a nervous chuckle, following him out the classroom. His house, it seemed, was only a short walk from the school, and on the way there neither said much save for his usual check-up on Ginoza and the rest of her team. She had kept a small distance behind him while she pondered the very different scene unfolding before her. Rather than the hot sun of Cambodia painting the skies at dusk, the cool autumn wind blew the air, swirling around and seeping through her clothes as darkness steadily crept its way around. Instead of closed hallways and hushed prayers they walked through an open field, the two of them alone with the grass and trees, the solid ground they walked on telling them they were indeed in the same place; home, in a broader sense— _his home_ , in a stricter one. Up ahead, the small lamp outside Kogami’s house served as their guide.

***

“I never thought you’d be so near,” she wondered out loud, watching the vapor swirl above her cup of coffee. She sat on the floor by the fireplace, back resting on the couch, eyes slightly drooping at the soft cracking of burning wood. Kogami came up to wrap a blanket around her before taking the cup of coffee from her hands and effectively waking her up.

“S-sorry!” she nervously replied, shrinking into the warm fabric and slightly embarrassed that the first thing she did was take a whiff of its scent. She focused her eyes on the bright flames, breathing slowly to calm herself.

“Don’t be,” he reassured, and through her sleepiness she could hear the tone of a plea in his voice, before he put the cup to his lips and sipped the coffee meant for her. Drawing her legs up to hug beneath the blanket, Akane takes her eyes off the fire and rests her cheek on her knees.

“I never imagined I’d be here now, either,” he muses, sitting next to her and putting the cup down on the floor. “I came back here almost a year ago after Sibyl had almost taken over the whole SEAUN. The guerilla had disbanded, even joined the ranks of law enforcement, ironically enough.”

“I guess I just ran out of options. Didn’t really think I belonged here either but at that point I really was tired and had nowhere else to go. Things were tough in the beginning, not really knowing what I could, or should do. It was a long period of adjustment. I had to unlearn the defensive instinct of having to watch my back all the time.”

Her eyes travelled to his body, keenly observing the lack of tension in his build as compared to the hard and solid frame that was the man of two years ago. It occurred to her that they had not the luxury of time to speak of the many things that had happened in between their parting, even before this second time that they had met. And like before she aches to seek validation that he hadn’t changed, though no part of her could muster the courage to bring up things that she now knew were no longer part of this little world, this peaceful home in the middle of nowhere… The light cast shadows on his face and gave her reason to admire it, feeling a tinge of jealousy at the quiet tranquility that manifested in his whole being.

“I’m glad you seemed to have found a higher calling, too.”

“I didn’t think I would be doing this, but the nearest open school was two hours away and I figured teaching kids how to read would be a good use of my time after I ran out of weeds to pull from the vegetable garden,” he mused, beaming at the memory. “Frankly I didn’t think I had much going for me when I came back here, but here I am.”

Akane smiles and looks away despite the somber tone of his voice, choosing to shift her interest on the glowing embers and pretending it wasn’t fear that had caused her eyes to water. Regardless of what had happened before, things had ended up quite well for him. In fact he didn’t have to talk about how wonderful all of this was making him feel. There didn’t need to be any sort of description, of how things used to be and how things are now; it was telling in the way he spoke and the brightness of his smile—by all means a changed man, and a happy one at that. Akane didn’t think she would feel all too passionate about it, but now it was almost tangible how much she wanted to protect this new found peace of his. Her very presence here threatened to destroy it, and first thing tomorrow morning she was going to leave.

***

More than her body, it was her mind that rejected the idea of lost time at the knowledge of their impending goodbye. Upon gaining consciousness the first thing she wanted to do was wake up to start another conversation, even when she couldn’t remember where to pick up from. Her mind was heavy, and tired, and more than anything she wished he had kept her awake—he was partly to blame for the state she was in, not even keeping her engaged when all she wanted was to keep hearing his voice till she memorized it. Surely this Kogami would not be the one she would see when trying to figure out a case, or when having a moral dilemma too tough for her to handle. In the early hours where she could take a deep breath and smell his favorite cigarette, she would remember all that she needed of him.

What she didn’t need was to open her eyes and realize that the fabric that she snuggled against belonged to his shirt, and that the steady thumping against her ears was of a heartbeat not her own. She didn’t need to feel his arms around her, warming her in a way the blanket never could. The last thing he needed was to see his face up close—so close, that she could reach up to brush the hair above his forehead. Disturbing the stillness of his sleep with the back of her hand on his cheek, fingers above his scars that were slowly fading, she gazes, wistful, before he slowly opens his eyes.

“Good morning,” he mumbles, throwing his head back to stretch before bending forward, surprising her as she recoils in his arms. Underneath the blanket he held her, lightly, as if he was giving her a chance to move away if she wanted, though with difficulty, thanks to his head nearly colliding with hers and effectively having her face almost flush against his shoulder. 

“You fell asleep last night and I didn’t want to wake you.”

Akane merely nodded, not believing this was what she was going to be left with. He smelled good, like leaves and earthen musk and the soft hint of Spinel cigarettes— her fingers clutched the fabric of his shirt, closing her eyes she allowed herself to savor what little of him she could get.

Kogami leaned back and held her so that he could see her face, admiring the fresh look that a few hours of sleep had given. Among other things, her hair was something to appreciate, looking not a strand out of place. Still he could not resist tucking some of it behind her ear, watching her eyes glaze as he did. He could not bring himself to speak, somehow, wondering at the back of his mind why no part of this felt uncomfortable. There was a slight sorrow in her eyes that he could not fathom, and he would be a fool to claim his observance as mere curiosity to hide his genuine care.

“I didn’t think I was going to see you again,” she admitted, looking down and unfurling her fingers above his chest. Kneeling in between his legs and still trapped within the blanket wrapped around them both meant she could not put the space between them required for her to say what she needed all her will for. His hands on either of her arms were now rubbing them comfortably, easily as if they had been doing this all their lives. She bitterly rejects the comfort in her mind by saying something she thought would have an effect.

Only it affected her the most.

“I’m happy that you’re happy—“

She heard herself say in between blurred vision and nervous chuckles, looking to the side and avoiding his gaze. For all intents and purposes she had wanted to get this over with in a less personal and more detached manner, and for someone not meant to be here this was already overstaying. If only she had woken up nowhere near him; if only he wasn’t the first real thing that her eyes had seen… she could walk away from this only physically unscathed, preserving his safety and his new life and moving on with hers—why did he have to be so kind when he could have easily left her sleeping, why did he have to change the way she was supposed to wake? Her resolve crumbled at his touch, burning the line of her jaw as he traced his finger over it. No part of her wanted the way he looked at her, soft gaze and warm fingertips would haunt her dreams worse than nightmares—she did not want what she wanted the most.

“I am happy, but…”

Kogami remembers the feeling of watching a moving vehicle take her away with no guarantee when he will ever see her again. Life had changed far too much for him to not be able to grasp a sense of future; gone were the days when his top priority was to survive. The man he sees in his mirror every day was thirty-three years old, with three lives behind him, once-broken man none-the-wiser, finally had made something of himself. He hesitates, before a shadow of confidence overcomes him and the weight in his heart pulls him together. Either he says this now or he never will.

“I’m happier because you’re here.”

He emphasizes his point by drawing her closer, before she recovers from the shock, and wraps his arms around her in a tight embrace. His breath fans the crook of her neck, and she swore his lips trailed over the exposed skin there, curving into a smile. She had given hugs quite often in her life, only a week ago when she embraced her mother and father before leaving their home. Anyone granting her the gesture probably would have felt no different, though it was her madly beating heart against his, the comfortable feeling of safety within the breadth of his shoulders and the way her arms sought to do the same told her he wasn’t just anyone, and this was all the confirmation she needed.

“Really?” she asks, more to herself, closing her eyes and feeling every part of him that she could hold. After all, there was no one she trusted more, and lies were something neither of them would ever get used to. In her eyes were tears she would never shed, granting herself a piece of happiness in a moment’s weakness. Kogami nods and whispers a quiet “yes” across her skin with as much glee as he could keep his own voice from shaking, savoring the warmth of her embrace on an otherwise cold morning.

Looking up, she allowed herself a moment to gaze closely at his face, fingers reaching up to caress the scars on his cheek. It was the only comfort she could give after not being able to help him two years ago, when he managed to offer her a smile even when his own feet could barely hold him up. Watching his forehead crease in wonder and his eyes soften under her scrutiny, she allows a moment of gratitude that they had both lived to see this day. Even if she wasn’t here to do what he had offered before they parted.

“I should arrest you …” she wonders in jest. Last night she had one foot out the door, ready to leave this place, ready to let him live a happy life. It really wasn’t fair, now that she thinks about it. He wasn’t holding her like this, and what a world of difference it makes.

“Yes, you could,” he agrees, fully prepared for it. “I won’t hold it against you.”

“Maybe I don’t want to,” she whispers, eyes downcast.

“I won’t hold that against you, either.” He lifts her chin, running a thumb across her bottom lip. Meeting her gaze, searching, he gathers all his confidence inside, wondering if, now that he had something to offer, that it would be good enough.

“Stay with me. I’ll protect you.”

His words came out short of a whisper, but clear as day, and she remembers all of a sudden the circumstances that had brought her here. She could think of several reasons why saying yes would be a bad idea, with the laws she already knew she was breaking, coming here and not notifying the authorities. But what law did she really want to protect when her choice from the start was to protect him?

They turn their heads towards each other, like it had only dawned upon them that they had never been this close before. Part of them already knew this had to be where all of this would lead, yet they both hesitate for a moment, breath fanning each other’s lips, before she closes her eyes and he takes her invitation. Their lips touch in a quiet tenderness that kept both hearts racing despite the warmth unfurling within their chest, the same calm and caution washing over them as they parted. Kogami opens his eyes and sees himself in hers, half in disbelief, before he surprises her by descending upon her once more. Akane responds with passion, bringing herself flush against him, one hand with fingers twined against his while the other hand rested on his cheek, closeness that left room for nothing but intimacy in their small space.

She could feel her heart ache beneath his gaze, but in a good way; filled with emotions she had never felt so much of before. Perhaps it was because she had been trying to for years, and because it was only now that she had really allowed herself to. She touches his face, bringing herself closer to meet his eyes with a promise, and her biggest risk; a choice she could never back away from.

Her answer came in three words, tumbling out of her mouth like a long-kept secret that she was ready to tell. 

***


End file.
